This Girl...

She's sweet.

She's saucy.

She's silly.

 

 She's bossy.

 This girl is BUBBLING OVER with personality.

Look out, world. Here comes Lulu.

Gotcha Day

Jimmy and I are quite familiar with the wide array of emotions involved with the adoption process and the days leading up to that "Gotcha Day." But even on this fifth adoption, the same explosion of feelings prevailed--nervousness blended with pure joy, mixed together with fear and a burst of excitement. But when I woke up that morning, I definitely felt differently. I was a more peaceful person on the inside and more calm on the outside than I had been in weeks. It could only have been the power of the Holy Spirit and the grace of God to calm me so. We ate our breakfast that morning with Jeff and Julia, and then we headed back to our room to gather our things. It was time.

We met Maggie, our guide, in the lobby and loaded into the van to drive over to the Civil Affairs office. We took in the sights around us, and Jimmy and I joined hands as we reflected on the fact that we were about to meet the little girl who'd been in our hearts since last summer. Our little girl.

When we pulled up to Civil Affairs, we barely had time to think, because Maggie said, "There's your girl!" And there she was. Lulu was standing on the stairs of the Civil Affairs Office with the Orphanage Director. Jimmy and I barreled out of the van and ran to her. We know better than to overcrowd...we sat next to her and gently introduced ourselves as Mama and Baba. Her innocent facial expressions bounced between uncertainty and fear, but only temporarily. We sat on those stairs for about five minutes and reassured her that we love her and that it will be okay. With that, she accepted us and took our hands to head upstairs to the Civil Affairs Office.

 

 

It didn't take very long for Miss Lulu to begin smiling and coming ever-so-slightly out of her shell. We'd brought a Twinkle Toes backpack full of peace offerings and took time to show her each item inside as we waited for paperwork to begin the "harmonious period" of 24 hours. Jimmy and I both knew that it was simply a formality. She was already our daughter.

 

 

When we were done, we walked to a nearby photo shop to take a family picture for her Chinese passport and her adoption paperwork. This beautiful child who'd seemed only a dream for so long was finally in our arms. We could feel her skin and hear her voice. 

Lulu was obviously very loved and well-prepared for a family, and for that we are eternally grateful. With the clothes she was wearing and a small backpack of keepsakes, she bravely took our hands and walked away from everything she'd ever known with complete trust.  And with child-like faith, she never looked back. 

God is in the Details - arriving in Taiyuan

Sometimes God is overwhelmingly in the details. And if we don't open our hearts, it prevents us from seeing all the beauty of those signs around us.  One of the first things we spotted driving into the center of Taiyuan last Sunday, where we would meet our daughter the next day, was a statue of the famous WuWei horse, the very city--in all of China--in which our beautiful daughter, Madi, was born. It felt like the warmest welcome sign.

How do you explain that our guide in Taiyuan, China has a nice Irish name like Maggie, and that the first person who would greet us at our hotel was a young Chinese man named Murphy?  Yes...all the way in China.

 

 

Or that after beginning last Sunday at St. Joseph's Catholic Church in Beijing for Mass and then taking a scenic 2.5 hour bullet train ride into Lulu's province, we would be swept away for dinner in the finest Shanxi restaurant by a Grandma and Grandpa who we've known all the way from sunny Florida? It almost sounds like a movie, doesn't it?  But these were the real God-laced events of our Sunday arriving in province to meet Lulu.  That evening was the most amazing part, and there is only one word to describe our experience...surreal. 

Last fall at school pick up each day, my friend Margaret (who speaks Mandarin) would converse with a sweet elderly couple who spoke no English. Their granddaughter goes to Banyan Creek, the very same school as our kids. Well one day, Margaret discovered that they were headed back to China for several years. I overheard the conversation and happened to ask which province they live in. Her answer stunned me..."Shanxi." We quickly pulled up a map on our phones to verify it was the same province...the same one where our daughter was living. I told her which city we'd be staying in and it was--in all of China--the exact city we'd be staying in to adopt Lulu--Taiyuan. I promised to stay in touch with their daughter and son-in-law (who have kindly translated videos of Lulu for us during our wait) and told them that we wanted to see them while in China.

A couple of weeks ago, I reached out to their son-in-law to see if there was anything we could deliver to his in-laws, and we made arrangements. He gave me their phone number and asked me to call them right away to plan their visit to the hotel. Once we were settled on Sunday and had completed some necessary adoption paperwork with our guide, Maggie, I asked her to call them for us. And they asked if they could come meet us right then and there. As the Lord would have it--always in the details-- Maggie was available to stay and translate for us so we would be able to communicate with them.

We met in the lobby, and it seriously made me a puddle to see them across the world from where we'd first met. We marveled at the mere chances of our union, and it was only an event that God could weave together. They quickly became known as Lao Lao and Lao Ye (Grandma and Grandpa). We gave them their items, and Lao Lao handed me a most beautiful set of hand-crocheted coasters to keep as a gift. 

Then they graciously insisted on taking all of us to dinner. Their son-in-law drove us to a restaurant that's known as the best in the area and serves local Shanxi delicacies. In fact, the chef is well known and has restaurants in the U.S. too. We sat together in a private room and even though there was a language barrier, it didn't matter. You could feel the love in that room. These kind and generous people treated us to at least fifteen local delicacies--the dishes kept coming and coming. 

 

After our meal, we said our goodbyes and promised to see each other back on U.S. soil where we can treat them to a backyard barbecue at our home and with our daughter from their homeland province.  We marveled, again, at our union.  Something like this could only happen once in a lifetime, and we completed our reunion celebration with selfies and hugs.

I'd say God sure rolled out quite the welcome mat for us to meet Lulu the next day...such beautiful details to praise the Lord for.

 

Holy Ground.

Oh friends, I've got so much backtracking to do on this blog, but I'm going to start with today. Because it was about perfect inside the Home of Jesus at Our Lady of Lourdes Catholic Chapel on Shamian Island.

Our little one remained calm for the entire hour-and-a-half Mass as if she felt the Holy Spirit within that church. She flipped through the pages of the missal and tried to sing the songs with the choir in an English service. She clasped her cute little hands together and blinked her eyes tightly to mimic our actions, and she kneeled down with the rest of us in prayer. 

It was blessed.

 

And then the homily. The Priest spoke of true Love and Obedience, and my heart was filled with peace and calmness as we journey into new territory for our family. My eyes filled with tears as I stared up at that ceiling and remembered being on this same holy ground with each of our children, including our precious angel, Daniel.

It was sacred.

And though I've felt consumed from the sin of worry more than I'd like to admit this week, today the Holy Spirit gave me sweet signs and whispered to my heart saying, "You are loved. It will be okay. Trust me." God is good. All the time.

It was a peace that transcends understanding. 

After we shared in the Eucharist with brothers and sisters from all over the world inside this tiny chapel restored back in 1892, the Lecture asked new guests to please rise and introduce themselves. I nearly jumped up out of the pew to introduce this child...our precious and beloved daughter who spent her first five years in the confines of an orphanage and was now--miraculously--attending her first Mass with a mother and a father. I'm sure mine weren't the only tears shed in that moment.

And it was about perfect. It was the Grace of God.

Lulu Jane

Along the way, we've decided we would keep our daughter's Chinese name "Lu Lu" as her first name and call her Lulu. Although we don't yet know the meaning of the Chinese characters, which we hope to get in China, the meaning of her name from the baby-naming sources is "Precious Pearl" which is also, interestingly, her birthstone for June. She's used to it, and we love it. So why change? But choosing her middle name seemed a bit more difficult...

On New Year's Eve (yes, we've been unintentionally withholding for a while, lol), we'd gone to bed early, and I had a dream that night about her middle name. I woke up the next morning and remembered it distinctly...Jane.

Out of curiosity, I powered up my laptop and began searching all the popular name sites. And I found this...

"The name Jane is an American baby name. In American the meaning of the name Jane is: Gift from God."

Wow. I mean, who doesn't love that?  Lulu certainly is a gift from God.

Then I went on to seek interpretations from other sites. And I found this Hebrew meaning:

"Yehweh (God) is gracious, Yehweh (God) is merciful."

Oh yes, He is.

I signed off the computer to shower and get dressed for Mass on that first day of the new year--Madi was altar serving that morning. Jimmy had decided to stay back with the boys, so I was able to really pay close attention (those of you with young ones understand that the struggle is real).

And when Father Jay delivered the homily that morning, I heard these words flow from his mouth... 

"God is gracious and merciful."

My ears perked up like a new puppy. Did he just say that? Yep, he did. And I knew it was a sign.

So thank you, oh gracious and merciful Father, for Lulu Jane - our gift from God, our precious pearl. She is your gift, and we will surely treasure her in our family.

New Pathways

If this isn't a testament to how God provides, I don't know what is.

Two days ago, I was feeling the stress of our financial situation and the fundraising crunch. With travel dates confirmed, things were a bit tight, and I sensed the distress in my husband. 

I posted in a China Adoption Group on Facebook asking for any last-minute suggestions for fundraising or acquiring funds in general. I received some great advice, and three different people suggested that I contact an organization I'd never heard of called Pathways for Little Feet. Turns out they give interest-free adoption loans to families in need, and through them, $1.7 million in funding has been given out in over 200 adoption loans resulting in over 300 children who've come home to forever families. Wow.

When I completed my errands that morning, I took a look at the online application and realized that the application was huge. I've applied for eleven grants this time around, so I know what we're dealing with, and I knew that I'd best find out more information before investing much of our precious and dwindling time.

I picked up the phone and called the number. A man named Heath answered--the same Heath who was listed on the website, I presumed. I introduced myself  and from his voice alone, I felt a certain peace. Before I knew it, I was spilling out everything about our last-minute situation and was getting emotional to someone I'd never spoken to before.

This man was amazing, though. He wasn't rattled, and I could immediately detect that he wanted to help. He gently walked me through their criteria (financial requirements, credit scores, and application must be pre-travel), and thankfully we passed the initial test. He told me this, "If you can get me all of your paperwork, scanned and emailed, by tomorrow afternoon, I promise you that we'll put it at the top of the heap, and we'll review it by Thursday. Our time is short, and there are no guarantees, but we'll do our best."

That's all I needed to hear.

I put the pedal to the medal and worked on it diligently all day. And by the end of that night, in three separate emails, I'd finally sent every piece of backup documentation they needed. We'd beaten our deadline by almost a full day.

The next morning, I received an email from Heath confirming that they'd received my emails and asked if we could connect via Facetime that day. I talked to Jimmy and we set up a 1 p.m. Facetime call, which was actually such a blessing because we were forced to test our systems for next week.

When we connected, Heath took time to introduce the team at Pathways for Little Feet and made mention of our record-breaking application turnaround. They asked us about our family and about Lulu. Then he said, "Let's just cut to the chase. We're giving you an interest-free loan today." And I'll bet you can guess what happened next, can't you? We cried. Yes, we cried big old tears of relief that we do not have to worry about funds for the moment. And that is huge. We can pay this loan back on a reasonable payment schedule. It can be used for any adoption-related expenses (even for Lulu's medical needs which are yet to be determined) and they don't even want us to think about making our first payment until July.

Pinch me.

But the best part? The best part was when we all dried our tears, and Heath asked if we could pray together. He led us in prayer for safe travels, for continued financial provision, for Lulu's health and healing, for our children at home, for those who are caring for them in our absence, and for our whole family's transition when we return. It was simply awesome...

This morning, at some point, we will have a check in our hands which will allow us to make our final agency payment just in time. I'm not kidding...we needed to send these funds to our agency prior to travel, which happens to be bright and early Wednesday morning. God surely pulled off a last-minute miracle in the way of provision. And wouldn't you know it was almost exactly the amount we needed. His timing is always perfect, and we're so amazed by his pathways...

The Full Circle

A long time ago, Jimmy and I were childless. We were content, but our lives were focused on many of the wrong things, and we now realize how much we lived in a materialistic bubble.

We were approaching our forties when the Holy Spirit laid out a path of events to a family, to plant seeds within our hearts for children. One of those seeds came by way of my ob-gyn, and after a series of questions about our desire to be parents, she handed me a packet for an adoption agency. It would end up being our first agency that brought us our gem named Madolyn.

Another encounter was with friends of ours. These friends were slightly younger than us, and they had children already. They invited us for dinner, and over casual conversation and after-dinner shots of Limoncello, Jeff asked, "So what's going on with you guys...don't you want to have kids???"  His wife, Julia, gave him a swift kick under the table. But it was okay. We were up to the questions, and we listened to their case about what good parents we'd be. And you know what? We knew they were right. We were beginning to feel like there was more to life than our selfish tendencies and expensive useless possessions. We left the Kadel's house that night feeling even more pulled in the direction of a family.

This same couple, Jeff and Julia, had also been the ones to introduce us to new forms of charity that opened our hearts to children in general. Each Christmas, they gave a small group of us clown costumes to wear, and we visited a children's shelter together to shower these children with love and give them some cheer. Jimmy and I always managed to ruin our clown makeup with tears streaming down our faces.

Time went on and we started adding to our family one by one through adoption. Jeff and Julia had three home-grown boys and started a baseball team for children with disabilities called The Miracle League of Palm Beach County. We remained friends and saw each other as time would allow with our busy lives and schedules.

So, why is any of this relevant? When Jimmy and I started on this most recent adoption journey for Lulu, we were aware that some concessions might have to be made, and we honestly weren't sure if both of us would be able to travel. In fact, I was committed to traveling with a friend, if necessary. During that time, Julia and I had a conversation, and she offered herself up as a travel companion. She felt called by the Holy Spirit to take the journey, and we agreed to pray about it. But as the months passed, I knew I really didn't want to do this journey without Jimmy. He's Daddy, and he needs to be there too. At the same time, we certainly didn't want to deny Julia of the experience if she were willing to come along. And then Jimmy had a brainstorm and suggested that Jeff should come along, too. Afterall, they helped get this beautiful ball rolling twelve years ago. 

We all prayed about it, knowing how important this trip will be and that it's not your typical adventure. It's one that comes with a rollercoaster of emotions and many scheduled appointments. Jeff and Julia attended the travel conference call at our house. They applied for visas, and they had a family meeting with their brave-hearted boys, who all said--unanimously--yes, take the trip. And so they are. Jeff and Julia are literally leaping for Lulu with us.

We are so amazed by God's hand in this. It's come so beautifully full circle, and we pray that they are immeasurably blessed by the experience. We can't wait to see how God opens their already ginormous hearts on the other side of the world.