Monday, September 8, 2014

The Range...

It's a "been there, done that" feeling.  An incredibly vast range of emotions comes back to me, yet again, as our adoption journey comes before us.

Excitement, mingled with nervousness, tangled up with joy and hope, and occasionally...some fear creeps in.

It's all expected, isn't it? I mean, what we're doing--traveling across the world to face the unknown--doesn't that in itself deserve a multitude of human emotions? And this adoption might just be the most difficult we've experienced. We are leaving our children for two weeks...that alone had me in a puddle of tears yesterday. And I must acknowledge Joseph's age. This sweet child--though he will be instantly welcomed into our family and unconditionally loved, he is leaving everything he knows behind.  

Everything.

The other day, in the silence of a drive up north ten miles, I caught a small stretch of bumpy road on I-95. The sound was soothingly familiar: buh bump, buh bump, buh bump; the monotonous, yet relaxing, beat of rubber hitting uneven pavement.

My mind was instantly taken back to my childhood and our family vacation road trips to Florida. I distinctly recognized that sound from the many times I'd fallen asleep on our car rides. I remembered how I felt as, as a child, when I was awakened in a startle from that shifting of the road. But then, I'd remember where I was and whom I was with, and I knew that all was well. I felt safe and peaceful again.

Although a small and simplistic (that's me) analogy, this journey is much the same, and as I recently traveled the highway, I reflected on the similarities...

There are times in the road of the adoption process that the path becomes bumpy and uneven, we can feel somewhat uncertain, and we sometimes wake to reality in somewhat of a panic when we hit those bumps.

But then we remember where we are, and whom we are with on the journey. And we feel safe and peaceful again.

Every bump in the road (and mixed emotion) stretches us, and prompts us--more than ever--to prayerfully lean on God's sovereignty. I think that's one of the reasons that I love the adoption process so much...it has strengthened our faith in such unimaginable ways. It's the intense feeling of knowing that you can travel this unknown path, with all the range of emotions it brings, and trust that we are safe in the arms of our Lord and Savior. May He be glorified, bumps and all.

Next week at this time, we will have another little boy in our family to love. And that thought, my friends, just brings a whole lotta joy.

Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope. 

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